Thursday, December 6, 2012

Am I really bloggin???

You know, I never thought that I would start a blog. I am the last person who shares my thoughts, feelings, hell, I hardly share my words with other living souls. Yet, here I am at almost 6am writing my first entry into the blogosphere. The strange thing is that I can really not take any credit for this journey I am embarking upon, for the credit belongs partially to my oldest daughter Jennifer who told  me a few weeks ago that she wanted to be a writer. I asked her to send me a sample of her writing, and reading it made me think of the novel I started writing when I was her age. Of course, like many things in life, I never finished it and it has been lost through the ages. The other portion of the credit goes to my amazing wife. I know it sound very cliche, but here's how it goes.

So, Jennifer sends me her story which I eagerly read the minute my inbox "dings" on my iPhone. When I am done reading it I immediately forward it to my wife who reads it. I wait a few days to email Jennifer back with my thoughts on the story because I am very careful about how I word things normally, and with my little girl I want to be extra careful because I don't want to say something that might sound wrong and then she is scarred for life and never pens another word. Whilst I am thinking about her story over the next few days, and reading her story several more times, I begin to get an idea for a story rolling about in my brain. This leads me to jot down (ok, type a long note on my iPad)  one evening (much like this one) where my insomnia is kicking my ass and I am sitting in bed listening to the snores of my wife as I play games on the iPad. A few days later I send my feedback to Jennifer and go about the rest of my day. 
  Anyway...Over several says I keep hearing the same scene playing over and over in my head. It is a scene that actually happened several years ago, but only this time it is more of a storyline rather than just a memory. Since I can't seem to get it out of my head, I open up the notebook app on my iPad and start jotting it down. Next thing I know I am writing a story. Granted, I didn't really think of it as a story at first, just an amalgamation of words describing past events from my memory, but when I emailed it to my wife later after writing as much as I felt like pushing out of my head, I was told that 
I have the beginnings of a novel and I am strongly urged to continue with it. 

So that brings me to where I am today. Sitting in our bed at some ungodly early hour when the rest of the world is either lucky enough to still be sleeping, or just rousing themselves out of bed to get ready for their daily journey, I am writing. Honestly, I should be working on what my wife considers to be 
an amazing story that she can't wait to see printed and on the New York Times Best-Seller list (at 
least one of us has faith in me), I am writing the beginnings of a blog that I hope to use to express all 
the things that rattle around in my head but are unfortunately hard for me to articulate because my 
mind has trouble forming complete sentences and I often lack the ability to begin a train of thought 
and continue it without pausing to try to remember what I was saying in the first place. 

   Ironically, I seem to have a much easier time typing this right now than I do speaking most of the 
time. To think that I have already taken my night time doses of both my Percocet and Soma (3 hours 
ago) and my new higher, better, stronger dose of Ambien CR (15 minutes ago) and really should have been put to sleep by this combination a long time ago. However, at least this is more productive than 
sitting here playing The Simpons game on this iPad which truly is very addicting!

So begins my new journey into the therapeutic (I hope) world of blogging. I can honestly say right now that when sleep does finally come for me today I will enter into it with a strange, yet fulfilling, sense that I have actually accomplished something good. I believe that I shall do this daily to get my cluttered thoughts out into the open per se rather than let them fade away with the rest of my mind. Of course, this could be another thing that I start and remains unfinished down the line. However it ends up going, it is definitely life, or at least something like it.

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